Chimper’s World

I love to prank my friends.  There is 1 friend in particular whom I prank repeatedly just because it never gets old.  This is just 1 of the many episodes of "Prank Chronicles."

Growing up in Daytona, I would often spend long hours of the night looking to liberate Garden Gnomes from their prison in peoples lil rose bushes and plants. Garden Gnomes don’t like being stuck among a fountain in a damn lawn, they like to be free, and not have to deal with such bullshit.  I felt that it was my duty to free these poor creatures!

One day after a hearty night of liberating these innocent creatures I realized that my truck was getting full. "What am I going to do?" I said… and I knew just the thing. A quick stop at Wal-Mart, where I purchased Cardboard and markers, and my gnomish passengers and I were back on track towards my friends house with the goal of finding a better dwelling for my  newly liberated garden friends!

Since he was working… and his family asleep, I began making lil cardboard cut outs for my Garden Gnome family and made tiny picket signs for them to protest with etc.  About 15 of these mini creatures found areas to camp among his roof, his driveway, his porch, and throughout his lawn.

One gnome had a red hat and looked like David the Gnome and was explaining thru his lil protestor sign how he wants a new home after his show was canceled from Nickelodeon. 

Two other gnomes were playing football, but it looked more like a homoerotic version of leapfrog, and each was explaining to my friend how they wanted to live in an environment where people could accept them for their sexual beliefs.

One poor gnome was holding a lil deer and all he wanted was to not be persecuted for his beliefs in Bestiality.

Another poor little gnomy had a broken arm - a sure sign that he was a member of some distant war!  Deprived of Veteran benefits, he was looking for a home to retire in with friends just like himself!

These gnomes had a cause and all they wanted was a happy place to live? Could my pal provide that?

After the gnomes were set all over his yard, I went home…. laying in bed I got a phone call from a very amused friend around 7:30am when he got home from work to find a horde of gnomes atop his roof, littering his patio, and in a semi circle in his driveway protesting their rights. He said people were driving by on their way to work taking pictures of all of the gnomes! 

Being a kind hearted person, he accepted these creatures and they now live happily ever after …  in the same garden shit I originally freed them from.  Poor little bastards.